The Calm After the Storm

There are so many things going on at our house right now. We have roofers here. A new tenant is moving in downstairs. My new housekeeper and I are still figuring out how to best work together. A new dishwasher is sitting outside in my trunk, waiting to be installed. Life is crazy. I feel crazed. At times like these, my instinct is to keep looking straight ahead and push through the chaos, waiting for the calm after the storm. Just a few more days, I tell myself. Just get through this, and things will settle down. But, in reality, they never do. Sure, the roofers will be done, the tenant moved in, Miriam and I will settle into a comfortable routine, the dishwasher will get put in. But by then, there will be new things, other things. I have to remind myself that life with four young children is busy. It's messy. It's complicated. It's hectic. It's unexpected. And it's what I wished for with all my heart. Somehow, I have to change my automated response. I need to stop holding my breath, stop waiting for that elusive calm. I need to learn to relax in the midst of the chaos. When I focus on and hold out for the future, I miss out on today. So, now, when I feel myself drifting into autopilot, I tell myself to focus on the moment, the here and now. This is the calm. Those moments I've been waiting for are right here, all around me. And through that, I relax and embrace this busy little life that is my own. There are so many sweet moments to enjoy, if only I remember to stop and take them in.